Three Ways to Avoid Thursday Night Fantasy Football Disaster
Thursday Night Football could be an exercise in pain tolerance for fantasy owners. How much patience can you exercise? How many near misses can you handle? Thursday night fantasy debacles, as I’ve discussed again and again in this space, leave a 72-hour hangover, leaving our heads swimming in fake football regret. The numbers stare back […]
We Need To Talk About Joique Bell
The Detroit Lions’ primary running back is owned in just a tenth of ESPN fantasy leagues. But, you stammer with spittle on your lips and outrage in your heart, Mikel Leshoure is owned in 98 percent of ESPN fake football leagues. You just ran to your waiver wire and checked – he’s not there. Revise your […]
Three Ways to Avoid Thursday Night Fantasy Disaster
We’re hypnotized, sometimes, by flashes of brilliance and untapped potential. Fantasy owners aren’t into slow and steady; NFL coaches are. Which brings me to Denver running back Knowshon Moreno, and three ways to guard your precious playoff-bound fake football squad from the ruinous Thursday night performances that have sunk so many teams this year. The […]
We Need To Talk About Jared Cook
You’re racking up credit card charges that’ll make you wretch in January, you’re drinking to excess and humiliating yourself at holiday parties every weekend, and Jared Cook is about to become fantasy relevant again. It’s December. Think of Cook, a physical specimen at 6-foot-5 and 249 pounds who runs the 40 in an astounding 4.5 seconds, […]
Get Out of Here With Your Elite Defense
The most offensive strain of fantasy football dogma might be defensive. In a convention hall full of fake footballers last August in Atlantic City, the thinking was everywhere, infecting everyone like some End Times plague: We must, at all costs, draft the San Francisco 49ers’ defense, for there is no other defense that can pray […]
Three Ways to Avoid Thursday Night Fantasy Disaster
Bench Garrett Hartley. That’s about it. It’s going to be hard to mess up this one, dear reader. We have two offenses that run on high-octane gasoline and cocaine, one defense that has proven laughably bad through most of this season, and another that has looked increasingly vulnerable of late. The Saints-Falcons showdown on Thursday […]
We Need To Talk About Dallas Clark
It’s time for Dallas Clark hipsters to come back to their guy. The owners who, in late 2007 and throughout 2008, latched onto the tight end running seam routes for Peyton Manning’s well-oiled Colts machine and watched him catch 100 passes for 1,100 yards in 2009, should consider hooking up with the old man one more […]
Avoid the Thanksgiving Day Massacre
I’ve been there – you’re going into Turkey Day, locked in the heat of a lethal fake football playoff battle with your buddy or coworker or college friend who snuck his way into your keeper league and has proven a genuine douche bag over the first 11 weeks of the NFL season. You’re ready to […]