ALDS Game 3: Detroit Tigers’ Bats Purring in Oakland

The Detroit Tigers dropped Game 3 of the ALDS tonight at the hands of the Oakland Athletics pitching staff feat. Brett Anderson. There’s not much to marvel at in terms of jerk-play, since, believe it or not it was a clean game. Not a single error. The sky is falling. What does a TBS viewer have to do to get an error around here?

Brett Anderson gave up a total of two hits through six innings off Tigers bats. Anibal Sanchez gave up two earned runs on five hits through 6.1 innings. Stay tuned to Baseball Jerks for “Bring Steroids Back, Pitching is Boring.”

No jerks in this game, unless one takes the Tigers’ payroll into consideration, and we’ve done that enough already so we’ll just wrap with a few notes, and then the numbers.


  • The Oakland Coliseum is loud. Yellow, and loud, There’s no denying that the Athletics feed off the energy in their home ballpark. Last week, when the A’s swept the Texas Rangers to win the AL West, we were asking ourselves, how the hell did the Atheltics win all those games? And, tonight we are telling ourselves, That’s how the Athletics won all those games. A’s fans make the Coliseum look like a monster-truck rally and sound like a Minnesota Vikings home game.
  • Oakland’s arms are for real. They even got good performances from Tommy Milone and Jarrod Parker in the first two losses. The question is, how long can they keep it up?
  • Grant Balfour‘s beahvior on the mound seems more like hypomania than “rage.”
  • Yoenis Cespedes‘ progress as a rookie is hard to believe. These are no Dominican cigars.
  • After Sunday’s dropped ball, Coco Crisp was singing “Redemption Song” on his first inning theft of a Prince Fielder home run. Watch the video here.
  • Prince Fielder is 1 for 12 so far in the playoffs. Austin Jackson is 2 for 12 with 5 strikeouts.
  • The Texas Rangers are still not in the playoffs.
  • Miguel Cabrera, 1-4, SO


Numbers worth rolling your eyes at:

Total hits in the game: 9

Total strikeouts: 15

Total runs: 2

Total potential baseball fans turned off by TBS broadcasters: INF


Bud Selig might consider bringing in some replacement umps for excitement.

Stats courtesy of

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