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Dodgers, Tigers, Angels: Is the Joke Over Yet?

Tomas Laverty

Tomas Laverty, frequent contributor to the MLB section, runs a Detroit web design company called Detroit Spaces.

It’s been an interesting season to say the least:¬†anomalies¬†Mike Trout, Bryce Harper, exposed jerks like Melky Cabrera and Bartolo Colon, Vin Scully announcing he’ll be back for his 64th season, the “new-look” Marlins. But, for all the money that’s been thrown out there, there are a handful of teams who have absolutely no excuse for being as terrible as they are.

What happened to the Dodgers? I mean, Magic Johnson, Hanley Ramirez, Adrian Gonzalez, Josh Beckett, Nick Punto, Shane Victorino, Nick Punto, etc. Wasn’t this supposed to push them over the top? Well, I know Magic is not actually on the team but there was the thought, for a second or two, that maybe there would actually be some magic. So far, not yet.

The number one reason the Dodgers should be ashamed is for putting Vin Scully through another crap season. This guy has to be tired of calling crap games, as he did last night in the Dodgers 1-0 loss to the Diamondbacks, or as they are so affectionately called, the “D-Backs”, (for Christ’s sakes, can we not come up with a different nickname for these guys?).

At one point in the season, the Dodgers were 30-13. Matt Kemp was raking, pitching was solid enough, and Vin Scully was fantastic. Now, they are six games out of first at 74-68. The Giants (sans Melky Cabrera) have moved into the top spot and it looks like they’re there to stay.This year has been a disapointment for more than just the Dodgers. Vin may yet change his mind about returning for his 64th season in the broadcast booth. None would blame him.

The Tigers have failed to do anything significant (given their hefty payroll). They are still two game behind the White Sox, who, in general aren’t very good. Last night, the Tigers scored more than two runs for the first time in their last five games.

Prince Fielder, Miguel Cabrera and Justin Verlander haven’t been able to keep the Tigers afloat this season and they are running the risk of looking like a bunch of charlatans if they don’t win the weakest division in the American League.

And then there’s the Angels. They signed the most boring superstar in baseball (Albert Pujols), they got C.J. Wilson, they got Zach Grienke, and they have rookie phenom Mike Trout. But, they are not winning their division. Well, that’s alright because Texas is a better team. Problem is, the Angels might not even get in with a wild card because of, wait for it, Oakland. Bob Melvin’s group of tough-luck dirtbags is out-hitting and out-pitching a team with nearly $100MM more invested in salary.

This has to be the worst case scenario for Scioscia and the Angels — to get beat out of a playoff spot of by the Oakland Athletics, a team where the most recognizable names are Coco Crisp, Bartolo Colon (now suspended), and Yoenis Cespedes (a rookie).

This year is proof positive that money can’t buy a championship. These three teams are on the verge of total failure if something doesn’t change drastically over the next few weeks. Oh well, if and when they don’t succeed, we’ll have something to talk about here at Baseball Jerks.